i just wanna scream...i really want to go lie down on my bed and pull up the covers over my head...
i'd love to sleep the whole day...
and forget all the pains and heartaches i've been experiencing lately
but of course, i can't...
coz to live like that would ruin me...
i'm holding on to my sanity...
and it's a true blue fact that God is carrying me everyday...
the pain is wretched.
sometimes i just want to pull my hair...
i really want to run away.far far far away from here...
but it seems like there's no place that i can run to...
oh, i know somewhere that i can really run to and no one can find me...
hehe..somewhere in south america, i know there's a place for me...
hehe...i really want to go that country where the sun never sets...
the 24/7 sunny country...
coz darkness makes me weep...
coz the lack of light scares me...
i just want to run away..even if it's wrong.
i want to shut myself away from the world...
i just want to stare at the ceiling and forget that my heart's aching...
everything's just so messed up...
i don't know what to think anymore...
coz it's really. magulo.
i'm not the only one who thinks so, though.
everyone who knows what's happening says it's realy magulo.
i know it is...
is there still hope?
i don't know...
it's scary.this is really scary.
but i'm willing to forget my fears if it means being with you...
why don't you fly away with me?
It took one lookand forever lay out in front of me,
one smile then i died only to be revived by you
there i was, thought i had everything figured out
goes to show just how much i know about the way life plays out
i take one step, away and i find myself coming back to you,
my one and only,one and only you
i know, that i know not a thing at all'cept the fact that i am yours and that you are mine...
you told me that this wouldn't be easyand though i'm not one to complain
*sigh* i wish things could be simple na...
sana maging masaya na ko...
i understand your reason for leaving for U.S.
if it was me, i'd run far away and go to namibia.
kaya lang i might get aids...
hehe..siguro somewhere like...Amapola.
Guatemala Yucatan.
and just stay there till i rot...
and just waste away my life, pretending that i'm fine...
i just want to get over this phase.this pain.
i just want to be back...with you :'(
sigh.
fire.phoenix.goddess
7:45 AM
0 lovers
Monday, February 06, 2006
obsession
--crazy for you--
Swayin' room as the music starts,
strangers makin' the most of the dark...
Two by two their bodies become one.
I see you through the smokey air,
can't you feel the weight of my stare?,
You're so close but still a world away,
what I'm dyin' to say is that I'm
Crazy for you, Touch me once and you'll know it's true..
I never wanted any one like this,
It's all brand-new, you'll feel it in my kiss
I'm crazy for you, crazy for you.
Tryin' hard to control my heart,
I walk over to where you are,
Eye to eye - we need no words at all.
Slowly now we begin to move,
ev'ry breath I'm deeper into you.,
Soon we two are standin' still in time,
if you read my mind you'll see
Crazy for you, crazy for you.
It's all brand-new, I'm crazy for you.
And you know it's true, I'm crazy, crazy for you.
I'm crazy for you, baby.
--gemini--
come a little closer, flicker in flight,
we'll have about an inch's space,
but i'm here i can breathe in, what you breathe out
let me know if i'm doing this right,
let me know if my grip's too tight,
let me know if i can stay all of my life,
let me know if dreams can come true
let me know if this one's your's too,
coz' i see it and i feel it right here, and i feel you right here
the vacuous night steps aside to give meaning, to gemini's dreaming
the moon on its back and the seemingly veiled room's lit by the same star...
--WE BELONG TOGETHER--
I didn't mean it when I said I didn't love you so
I should've held on tight, I never should've let you go
But I did nothing, I was stupid, I was foolish
I was lyin' to myself
I could not fathom I would ever be without your love
Never imagined I'd be sittin' here beside myself
Cause I didn't know you, and I didn't know me
But I thought I knew everything
I've never felt
The feeling that I'm feeling now that I don't hear your voice
Or even touch and kiss your lips cause I don't have a choice
What I wouldn't give to have you laying by my side
Right here, Cause baby
When you left I lost a part of me
It's still so hard to believe
Come back baby please, cause
We belong together
Who am I gonna lean on when times get rough
Who's gonna talk to me on the phone til the sun comes up
Who's gonna take your place, Baby nobody else
Oh, baby, baby, We belong together
I can't sleep at night, When you are on my mind
Bobby Womack's on the radio, Singin' to me
'If you think you're lonely now'
Wait a minute this is too deep, too deep
I gotta change the station
So I turn the dial tryin' to catch a break
and then I hear Baby Face
I only think of you
It's breakin' my heart
I'm tryin' to keep it together
But I'm fallin' apart
I'm feelin' all out of my element
Throwin' things,
Cryin' tryin' to figure out
Where the hell I went wrong,
The pain reflect in this song
Ain't even the half of what I'm feelin' inside
I need you, need you back in my life, baby
laln..mejo senti lang..grabe, i can't believe this day..sobrang ewan..
buti na lang mejo kinaya ko pa..sobrang out of it lang tlga ko..
wala akong naintindihan sa sinasabi ng teachers ko..
i cried while writing my english paper..basta.
tapos i slept through two classes..
sobrang puyat..
nagwworry na nga sila aya..
coz ang tahimik ko..maputla..tapos mejo maga pa mata ko..
*sigh*
--i seem to keep on saying those words lately a lot..
anyway, aun lang..
there will always be things i will regret..
and i will never forget the lessons learned in the past few days..
IF YOU LOVE SOMEONE, LET THEM KNOW..
IT MIGHT BE TOO LATE NA..
silly me.
...i wish it would be a happy day tomorrow...
a happy o7...
sigh.
fire.phoenix.goddess
9:21 PM
0 lovers
Sunday, February 05, 2006
save me..
save me..
save me..
save me..
i can't do this alone..
save me..
come back and save me..
please..
i need you..
fire.phoenix.goddess
10:00 PM
0 lovers
Saturday, February 04, 2006
crap obsession
--some crap--
1.Name: princess
2. Your Nick Namedv: princess o7
3. Current Location: in my own little world... =p
4. Place of Birth: manila, i think..
5. Zodiac Sign: aquarius.
6. Male or Female: somewhere in between.still can't decide eh! hehe :)
7. Age: 18
8. Complexion: fair.hehe
9.Occupation: moon goddess...princess :)
10. Residence: paranaque
11. screen name: princess o7 :)
__Your Appearance___
12. Hair Color: very very very dark brown.
13. Hair Long or Short Hair: mahaba na ulit...
14. Eye Color: dark brown.
15. How do your nails look: dirty.eeewww
16. Do u like yourself: most of the time..hehe
17. Piercing: one on each ear lang...
18. Tattoo: sana!!! i really wanted sa ankle...
19. Righty or Lefty: righty.
___Your 'Firsts'___
24. First Roller coaster: i dunno..super bata pa ko..baka grade 3...
25. First cell phone: nokia 5110.
26. First best friend: si camille! ex-neighbor..she went off to davao years and years ago//
27. First Award: most polite.can you belive that?!?!
28. First Sport You Joined: hehe :) arnis.
29. First pet: a cat named rose :)
___ Favorites___
33. Movie: beauty and the beast
34. TV Show: totally spies.
35. Color: white, yellow, pink, blue
36. Artist: ...m.y.m.p?
37. Song: crazy for you...
38. Food: pasta, pizza, chocolate...
39. Drink: mocha frappe :)
40. Candy/Chocolate: chocolate - van houten, cadbury, hersheys...candy..mentos lang. :)
41. Sport: arnis
42. Favorite sport you watch: arnis na nga lang..
43. Brand Of Clothing: y.r.y.s ata...
45. School Subject: lit..arts...
46. Animal: cats, dogs, penguins, and bears!!!
48. Magazines: time, candy..,
___Your Future___
58. Want Kids: yes!!!
59. Want to Get Married: SANA...
60. Careers in Mind: CEO.
67. Cute or Sexy: can't i say breath-taking?
68. Lips or Eyes: eyes...eyes...eyes
69. Hugs or Kisses: hugs and kisses...kisses...hugs... :)
70. Short or tall: taller than me sana...
71. Easygoing or Mysterious: easygoing w/ a hint of mysterious...
72. Romantic or Spontaneous: both... :) romantic more, though
73. Fatty or skinny: fatty!! sarap kayakap!!
74. Sensitive or Loud: both... :)
75. Hook-up or Relationship: STABLE, long-lasting RELATIONSHIP.
76. Sweet or Caring: both..more of the caring though.
77. Trouble Maker or Hesitant One: in between.. :) spice with cautiousness...
___Have You Ever___
79. Drank Alcoholic drinks: sort of..
80. Smoked: NO FREAKING WAY...
81. Ran Away From Home: nu-uh...
85. LOVED SOMEONE: of course.
86. Turned Someone Down: i think?
87. Cried when someone died? sobra...
___Do You Believe In__
90. Destiny/ Fate: not really.
91. Love At First Sight: no.
92. Ghosts: sort of...
93. Aliens: haha :) amazing
94. Soul Mates: well...not really. i mean, after all, it's really our choice...
95. Heaven: YES!
96. Hell: yes..
98. Kissing on The First Date: ay no.
99. Horoscopes: i read but i don't believe...
___Answer Truthfully___
100. Is There Someone You want But You Know you can't have?: huh? i have the person i shouldn't have...
im really busy,..gusto ko lang.hehe :) misssss you.
fire.phoenix.goddess
8:53 PM
0 lovers
Friday, February 03, 2006
stress relief
i have forgotten for a moment what im supposed to do..but anyway.
1. do u smoke? --no freaking way. EW!
2. ilang mug ng kape ang kaya mong ubusin n1day? --grabe, 1 cup lang naman...
3. laughed khit alang nkkatawa? -- minsan..hehe :)
4. cried khit alang nakaka-iyak? -- di ah!
5. ever tried na magwala? --yes, i did before i got a good mighty spanking.hehe :D
6. pumasok sa class khit d pa naghihilamos? --haha :D di naman.
7. pumasok ng class na di alam na may exam pala? --oo, sa math pa.hehe!
8. natulog kahit di pa gawa ang papers naipapasa knabukasan? -- hindi pa naman..sana never.
9. nautangan ka na ba tapos d binayaran? --don't remember eh..
10. may nakapagsbi na ba sayong suplado ka? -- oo naman.haha :)
11. anong sabi mo? -- wala lang :)
12. cno pinaka importanteng tao sa buhaymo?my family...my friends..and syempre sya na un!
13. ano ang pinaka masakit na nagawa mo para sa isang tao? --to give up.hehe :)
14. pano mo mssbi na mahal mo ang isang tao? --when you will do anything and you're not thinking of the consequences pag minahal mo na...hehe :) tska willing ka magsacrifice and one day you'll suddenly realize that you just have this big dopey smile on your face.hehe :D
15. maggwa mo bang magmhal ng 2 tao? -- ngek.eh di hindi true ung love na un kung dalawa kasi magkukulang ka dun sa isa..
16. would u fight for the one u love or lethim/her go? -- eh...ayaw ko pakawalan.
17. pno kng mdming ngsasabing d kau pwde? -- marami naman tlga eh..eh so what? mahal ko, mahal ako, ano'ng problema? *sigh*
18. anong ggwin mo pag umiyak sa tbi moung taong mhal mo? -- major panic mode! biro mo biglang umiyak sa tabi mo!!!
19. Pano kung kk-break nyo lang tpos gusto nya friends kau...ok lang? -- ay nu ba yan...no, di ko kinaya eh...
20. ngawa mo na ba magmhal ng kaibigan? -- of course..
21. ano mas mhrap, sbhin s kaibigan mo n mhal mo xa o itago? -- mas mahirap magsabi..it's awkward and scary.
i've been missing you lately, much more so than the past few days.i miss the feeling of your fingers brushing across my face.i miss the feeling of your embrace whenever i rush out to see you. i miss seeing that amazing smile which lights me up. i miss hearing your laugh, your voice. i miss your big hand which envelopes my hand. i miss holding you tight and feel your love for me overflowing. i miss your eyes. actually, i miss everything about you.
--[07]--
i miss tickling you and suddenly touching your cute little nose.i miss teasing you endlessly and just have you roll your eyes at me.i miss the feeling of having your strong arms wrapped around me as we let the hours tick by...i miss laying my head on your shoulder. i miss hanging out with you. i miss the times we would just hold hands and just watch people pass by quietly.i miss sitting beside you.i miss you.
--[07]--
in a few days, we will be celebrating something i didn't think we'll actually reach.what, with all our petty fights and our busy schedule...if only i could, i would trade anything for a day with you. but i know you understand that even if we want to, our responsibilities have to be faced.*sigh*
i love you.this is a too-blatant testimony to that.i miss you...i miss you...i miss you.when will i see you?*sigh*i love you.
je t'amo comme toujours.
fire.phoenix.goddess
9:38 PM
0 lovers
Wednesday, February 01, 2006
---
i feel sad today.i mean ngayon..kanina kasi mejo okay pa ko, ngayon hindi na...
sigh, i didn't think i'd end up my day a little sad.
eh kasi ang alam ko talaga pag na turn-off, di nya tanggap un part na un about you...
what was i supposed to feel? eh ganun talaga ko...
maybe if you see that part of me, you'll turn away in disgust.
you'll feel horrified or whatever.
i'm so scared for you to see that coz i don't want to see you turn away because you still can't accept na "hey, ganun pala siya?!?"
i mean, fine, you said tanggap mo.pero naturn-off ka! excuse me for thinking that way.
i don't know.
i'm just waiting for the day na matanggap mo ko, buong-buo.
na walang part sa'yo na naturn-off, natturn-off, at matturn-off about that wild part of me.
and i got a bit messy talking to chimmy.
sa sobrang badtrip ko, sigh.damn i love chimmy.she makes me laugh talaga.
anyway.basta.aun lang, i just wanna get this out of my head and out of my system.
sana matapos na to.
im not paranoid.this isn't one of those paranoia things.
or maybe it's too much for me to wish for.
is it?
i can't go back to the past and erase that memory.it seared my memory.the time you said na naturn-off ka.
its times like this na talagang malutong ako magmura.
i should really get going with my life.sigh.
night-night...
fire.phoenix.goddess
10:20 PM
0 lovers
--31 things about me and other ramblings--
31 things about ME
1.YOUR HOROSCOPE?>> aquarius
2. SiNGLE OR TAKEN?>> definitely taken, committed, and serious about it :D
3. iN LOVE?>> yes.very much so :D
4. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN SERiOUSLYHURTBY A PERSON YOU LOVE?>> of course, always.not just by my cute monster though :D
5. WHAT WOULD BE YOUR REASON iFYOU TURNED SUiCiDAL?>> depression. nuf said
6. iS SUiCiDE REALLY KiLLiNGYOURSELF?>> there's social suicide and then there's death.so i guess not.
7. COUNTRY OR CLASSiC?>> classic...
8. PREFER CUTE/iDiOT ORSMART/UGLY?>> smart/ugly nln noh...i love intellectual DISCUSSIONS.not arguments.
9. ARE YOU iN A STABLE RELATiONSHiP WiTHYOUR BF/GF?>> at long last, yes.last week was kind of rocky kasi.
10. YOU`D EXPECT A TEXT MESSAGE USUALLY FROM:>> >>-->>07<<--<<
11. HAVE A BEST FRiEND THAT iS iNTHEOPPOSiTE GENDER?>> nada.
12. WHAT DO YOU LiKE DOiNG WHENYOU`REDEPRESSED?>> eat ice cream.loads of it.
13. CHEERFUL OR BORiNG?>> manically cheerful
14. DESCRiBE A PERFECT DATE?>> romantic dinner date which started with a view of the sunset.tapos dancing under the stars...
15. EVER WONDERED WHY NOBODYKNOWSWHY THE SKY iS BLUE?>> kaw lang siguro but people who went thru high school do know..hello
16. EVER BEEN HURT BY LOVE?>> by love? hm.i think so.
17. WiLL YOU EVER MAKE THE SAME MiSTAKE AGAiN? WITH LOVE???>> i hope not.
18. EVER HATED ANYONE LiKE HELL???>> damn yes.
19. WHAT WILL YOU DO WHEN A PERSONBREAKS UP WiTH YOU AFTER ONE DAY?>> laugh and say na it was just a joke for me lang
20. GiVE ONE WORD THAT BESTDESCRiBESWHAT YOU`RE FEELiNG NOW?>> indifferent
21.DO YOU BELiEVE iN YOURSELF?>> sure, no one else will.
22. EVER PHYSiCALLY HURTYOURSELF??>> yes and im not proud of it.
23. EVER VERBALLY HURT YOURSELf?>> of course.
24. MOTTO iN LiFE?>> you'll never know until you try :D
25. WHAT IS YOUR PURPOSE IN LIFE?>> to love and make everyone's life around me a little happier :D
26. HAVE YOU EVER HAD FEELiNGSABOUT A FRiEND FROM THE OPPOSiTE GENDER?>> of course..even with my monster, i'm still kinda normal. LOL
27. iF YES, WHAT DiD YOU DO?>> un last..i ran away from it.
28. iS FAME & MONEY THE MOST iMPORTANTTHiNGS iN YOUR LiFE?>> NO FREAKING WAY.
29. DO YOU MAKE ANY MOVEMENTS OR SOUNDS WHEN YOU`RE SLEEPiNG?>> sounds lang.sometimes, i talk :D
30. ARE YOU DiFFiCULT TO WAKE UP?>> no.i wake up easily...
31. HOW OFTEN DO YOU SLEEP?>> as much as i can :D heheheheh!
i love you baby.
okay...i went blog-hopping like hell..okay, i've been reading her blog entries and it moves me.it sooo moves me i want to cry. heheh :D osige tatapusin ko na entry ko so i can read her blog in peace.i hurt for her.ang sad.parang ang gago na ewan. parang mas okay un nangyari sa'kin na pag tinatanong siya kung mahal pa niya ko, lagi niyang sagot: HINDI na.odba.ang ouch naman nun..well that's life. ako kaya, iiyak na naman ba ko for that same freak reason? i hope not. that's too sad.that will make me break down..lalo na ngayon..ngayon na mahal na mahal ko na talaga siya..
life really is a bitch.
sigh.. i love you.
fire.phoenix.goddess
8:17 PM
0 lovers
survey from abby11 :D
1. wonderful things that happened yesterday?
- kasama ko monster ko!!!
2. nagdasal ka ba?
- oo naman...
3. wat tym is it?
- time for me to take a bath... hehe :) 10:40 am
4. you feel ______..
- STRESSED AND WORRIED over my papers...
5. ano ang mga suot mo kanina?
- shorts and spag top pa rin...
6. kelan enrolment nio?
- sa june pa pero pag summer..i guess sa march.
7. in lab ka ba?
- in "LAB" no.in "LOVE", yes.
8. ano mas gusto mo, prof nio sa logic or sa theo?
- ay naman, theo na lang..seeing na wala pa kong logic ngayon..hehe :D
9. things that u usually do at home?
- magtext ng sobra and kumain..matulog...maging bum!!!
10. ano favorite food mo?
- well....chocolate.pasta, pizza! yum-yum!
11. ano unang ginawa mo paggising?
- nagmumulat ng mata and check the time..im time-conscious.
12. ur crush?
- un bear na binigay ko sa monster ko..hihi :D
13. describe urself...
- im the seventh princess and goddess of the moon. :) dba, baby?
14. ano ang usually na ginagawa mo pag bad3p ka?
- nagmumura.hehe :) tumatahimik.pag di ako kay b inis, i bitch sknya.hehe :D
15. e pag masaya?
- ngumingiti with shining eyes.haha :D
16. e pag me nasaktan ka?
- nagssorry agad.sincerely.
17. e pag nainluv ka?
- wala.nagddaydream.hehehe :D
18. ano balak mo para bukas?
- pumasa sa bio test.hehe :D
19. na love at first sight ka ba?
- crush at first sight pa lang naman...
20. naka2log ka na ba sa klase nio?
- oo!!! alam pa nga ng teacher eh.. :D
21. describe love.
- love is blind.soooo blind.
22. nagyoyosi ka ba?
- NO FREAKING WAY.
23. e uminom?
- hmmm...dati lang...last year pa un!
24. may kinaiinisan ka ba ngaun?
- wala akong naiisip at the moment.
25. masarap ba ang kamote?
- i guess?
26. ilang minutes ka naliligo?
- 20 minutes max..
27. ano ang una mong pinanood sa sinehan?
- i don't know...
28. me plano ka bang sumali sa fraternity?
- sana kung meron...joke :D
29. nakita mo na ba ang grades mo?
- last sem lang...
31. ano ang masasabi mo sa grade mo?
- okay lang.i could do better.
32. ano ang pipiliin mo??? -admirer mong jologs o ex mong bakla?
- ay naman.my ex is 'gay'. pero i would never choose my ex noh. wla na lang.
33.ice cream o 5 pesos?
- ice cream!!!! kung chocolate.
34-dream car or studies?
- studies na noh...
35. may gumugulo ba sa isip mo? kung oo, ano ang mga yon? kung hindi, bakit?
- civ paper ko!!! ='(
34. favorite basketball player mo?
- wala.ate ko :D
35. nagago ka na ba ng crush mo?
- oo naman.
36. ano ulam mo kagabi?
- hm? i ate choco revel bars...
37. ano masasabi mo ngaun?
- i'm going to be late. gtg!!!
Princess, you're inspired by Helping People
Not everyone has the compassion and generosity to look out for the greater good. Lucky for all of us, there are kindhearted people like you who make a real difference in this world. You're probably the first to step up and lend a helping hand whenever you can whether it's organizing a book drive for the library, serving dinner at a soup kitchen, or giving an elderly neighbor a ride to the doctor.Chances are, you're also driven by your ideals and want to really make a difference in the work that you do. But that doesn't mean you're unrealistic. You know that Rome wasn't built in a day and that it takes years — and even decades — to make changes in the fabric of society. Until poverty, illiteracy, and a plethora of other ills are no more, you'll do what you can to help out and make life better wherever and however you can.
"and now that you're here i never wanna say goodbye love...
never wanna be without you..."
fire.phoenix.goddess
10:32 AM
0 lovers